Time to Step Up!
- Jason Hyland
- Mar 26
- 4 min read
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Sitting here left to wonder how am I even here? Why me? What did I do to earn my seat at the table? And most importantly how long can I stay? As an addict, we ponder these questions every single day, as much as they may feel like an illusion to us. Today, it is an absolute honor to be sitting here at this table speaking to you because my actions unequivocally affected my family, my friends, even my dogs, and worst of all, myself. My effect on them was so strong that all these blessings had a rapid descent and poof disappeared, like a magic trick. No more family outings, no more grabbing coffees, no more holidays, no more texts and then before I knew it, that sacred chair was pulled right out from underneath me. Addiction effects everyone at the table whether directly or indirectly, no matter how indiscriminate and naive one may be.
I thought, “Well, what’s done is done, I guess. Time to accept that this is my life, and I’ve lost the privilege of sitting at the table with my loved ones enjoying the beauties of life”. We are left with nothing but distant memories, which only devour us even more when thought of one bite at a time. They were all gone for good because I couldn't stop affecting them. I didn't know how to escape, this was new territory for me. There were times that I’d try to bear down to get back in their good graces, only to succumb to my fate that this life, this lonely and scary life is now my life for good. I had to accept that this wretched decrepit seat called addiction is where I would be sitting forever.
Once all the texts and calls go unanswered, we turn to the only thing we know to ease the pain; the very thing that got us here in the first place. But these are only short-term fixes. Instant gratification is what starts this entire cyclical process. We live for that high because it took us away from whatever problem we were facing at the time. But soon we will realize that we’re suddenly running from that low. Every day becomes a challenge to do whatever is necessary to assure we avoid that beyond miserable feeling of being that low because we know withdrawals are on their way and they come with a vengeance.
Well now what, what do we do to get ourselves a seat back on the table? As arduous and agonizing as it will be, nothing will make you feel as alone, hopeless, and a lost soul to the world around us than a life buried in the bowels of addiction. If there is ever a motive needed to accomplish your daily goal of assuring you get your fix it is that horrifying word, withdrawals. When we’re living this horrid life, we work strenuously as possible every minute of our day to assure of us another night of escaping the lows of substance abuse. Why not use all that energy and wherewithal that we exert when trying to break loose from its wrath into something positive for a change? We’ve already proved to ourselves that we can power through anything that gets in our way no matter how difficult the struggle when in dire need.
Now imagine what we can accomplish when free of all the poison we put into our bodies? I’ll give you a hint, it’s what our parents always told us growing up, “You can do anything you put your mind to.” There is your answer, we can accomplish anything we desire with a clear mind and discipline, no matter how demanding the task at hand. We can finally envision the opportunity to do things we always wanted to, things that were kidnapped by our vices. We are finally free.
It all starts by believing in ourselves. The book Sacred Secrets sheds the perfect words, “We must become what we speak in order for it to manifest what we want to attract.” Believing in ourselves was once like a mystery to us, something on a far-off galaxy. We no longer have to be demoralized in our daily endeavors because we know we have it within us to conquer the challenges that arise, and they certainly will. Our beliefs grow the further we rid ourselves from our old depressing life, which we were merely existing anyways.
No matter how little progress we may gain, it is still progress in the right direction. Every achievement adds to our growing pile of wins. Each win starts by believing in ourselves followed by putting in the imperative work it takes, one day at a time. There is no denying that a very tough road is ahead but “the juice is worth the squeeze” as we continue to earn our wins. This feeling of accomplishment is better than what any substance can do for us. I distinctly remember when I had finally felt this experience in my early months of addiction, after completing two very simple tasks. I paid my utility bill and crushed a workout, what may seem like trivial tasks to complete, but not for the addict by any means. For the addict knows where every single dollar is going once obtained and not one nickel will be spent on bills, instead all our money leads to a place that only pushes us further away from that seat we so desperately yearn for.
So, I ask you, are you ready for the challenge to take your seat back and join me at the table?
You can find this reading and a lot more videos on addiction and recovery on our YouTube channel above. As we are slowly working back to making content that we hope brings value for you, we are going a different route by reading out these writings on camera for YouTube, give you a voice to the stories and feel the emotions with me. A Follow goes a long way during the rebirth of our recovery venture Thank you all!
PS: If you or someone you know is struggling, PLEASE don't hesitate to reach out on here or wherever works best. I am here to help!❤️🩹
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